6.13

still busy, sarah is in arkansas with the kids, and i’m thinking that i’m sad that i never got to see midnight oil in concert.

6.15

i just got a call from the fam on the road. they are west of tulsa and the rain is crazy. they wanted me to check the map and see how far the rain went. it’ll stop soon, i told them, but there are flash flood warnings.

6.18

spencer had his first mri today and he wasn}t thrilled about the mask and fought it. he is currently tumor free.

6.19

we finally got to see the iss and shuttle a short distance apart, maybe about as far as it is between a pair of loops of orions belt if that much.

6.25

i left work at 5.45 on friday, rode home in the heat to put food in my belly and return to the baseball park with the family [a work outing]. we stayed the whole game and spent $23 and the kids got another 7 or 8 from coworkers. spencer had a handful of change and was rushing to the concession stand but he had just $1.60 and that was going to get him nothing and he would have been dissappointed without assistance. we waited out 45+ minutes of shenanigans after the game for the fireworks. the kids paid a buck to go on the field and spencer stayed back with hands over his ears. he moved back two rows and sarah, myself, and another man kept watch on him. he was so incredibly tired but couldn’t take his eyes off the show.

the next morning my dad and i tore down a brick wall in our backyard to make room for our shed [eta unknown] in the balmy 103°F+ summer. we went down and cleaned my office and chased trains with spencer, getting home and getting out to eat with clay and erica. good times downtown.

sunday was church, dinner at sarah's parents and then home for an hour to clean before todd and julie and their kids showed up. todd and i have hung out since 6th grade and have far too many stories of goofy adventures. i still think he looks a bit like mike dirnt. fortunately, his story is nothing like mike’s.

now i am back at work...

6.30

i'll cover the last 2+ months in july, but here is the latest summary:

i’ve been informed by most everyone that i need to get a job that utilizes my abilities better [and get compensated for that]. easier said than done in my socialist mind. but i need to, and it is not just a simple choice but something i have to get to, something emotional. time to work on my resume and portfolio. «what are your last 3 jobs?» er, the one i’ve always had, then i think i flipped burgers one summer in san diego, and then before that i think i sold christmas trees. no wait, i was a piano mover.

this all comes about as i am burned out from working all the time and doing all the work in an assistantless place for the last few months, as well as creative freelance work. enough is enough. it doesn’t do me, the family, or friends very well. i didn’t really notice, but i haven’t written diddly. i need to do that for me to function/process.

spencer. i think that sums it up. okay, maybe not. he has got a tumor on his back already - took less than a week to grow. what does this mean? i have no idea, but it happened far too quickly. i was hoping puberty, not now. he has a fantastic laugh — if his appearance changes, i don’t want anyone to take his laugh from him.

it fills me with cry. i am full to the bottoms of my eyes and all i need to do is tilt my head and they come rushing out, and it hurts.